Saturday 30th April 2011

We had a bit of a scare yesterday, although it didn’t turn out too bad.  I was sitting at my desk and came over very strange.  I went very dizzy, very hot and couldn’t seem to function at all.  Bill took my blood pressure which was almost nonexistent.  After a quick chat with Isabel, Bill decided that I needed a check up at the hospital; so off we went.  I was still feeling odd even at the hospital for some time and so we waited to get checked out by the doctor.  She was great; she took my blood pressure and gave me an ECG which turned out to be normal.  It seems that this is an effect of the chemo and I was advised to go home rest, put my feet up and take salt; not normally something I would do.

Today was a little strange as well but I think it was the same thing.  Bill took me shopping as I wasn’t sure about driving and he wasn’t about to let me anyway.  I felt in a different land whilst out; which could be a good thing as shopping on a Saturday morning is a bit hectic.  After lunch I had a good sleep and now feel much better; perhaps chocolate biscuits helped. 

As this is the last chemo hopefully I will start to feel better soon.  I had the light headiness before the last time but this was the scariest; especially for Bill.  I am definitely looking forward to feeling better.

Thursday 28th April 2011

I have some amazing friends; I thought I would put that in first.  I was met on my last day of chemo, which was Tuesday by a group of ladies who wanted to celebrate with me.  I was tired, feeling sick but so glad to see them; thank you God for friends who support me.

I still have to go through some of the after effects of the chemo; in particular the tiredness but it does seem to be getting less.  Yesterday I managed shopping and some gardening; although the trees may not agree with that term; they look more like a massacre after I had finished with them.  I can’t help it if God made me too short to cut the tops which in effect means that they are not straight.   

I go to see the Dr on the 10^th May and hopefully she will have some news regarding the chemo.  I still have to have to go through radio from the 16^th May but it would be nice to hear some good news.  I am obviously not sure how much she can tell me before the radio but I continue to be hopeful. 

People tell me my hair is growing; although I just wish it would grow back quicker and slightly darker.  As one little boy when asked the colour; it is skin colour; or perhaps just white.  Why are kids so honest?

I still have lots of appointments at the hospital; I really do feel that I am wasting so much of my time there; especially with the sun shining.  The good thing is that they will be getting less; at least after mid June. 

The family are coming over for my birthday this year and I really can’t wait to see them.  They have already booked the good weather which suits me fine.

Well off to a meeting; I feel grateful that I have energy and a new lease of life after feeling so tired.  I will probably come home and sleep for a while but that is ok as each day is getting better.

Saturday 16th April 2011

I have just realised that it is 16 days since I updated my blog.  The good thing is that I have had a really positive time since I last wrote.    

I had my crazy chemo day on the 5^th April.  The reason it was crazy was that I had four appointments within a very short time.  Despite this we managed everything although we seemed to be running around the hospital quite a lot.  When we asked about the closeness of the appointments we were told it was normal and my doctor seemed to know what was happening; even if we didn’t.

The first couple of days after chemo I felt really well; so much that I went shopping, visited people and did loads of normal things.  For a couple of days I didn’t feel that good so I rested for a while but since then I have been feeling much better.  It helps that the sun is warm and at last I am warm again. 

My last chemo will be on the 26^th April; just after Easter; if all is well. It seems a great way to celebrate such a special time of the year.

Now the warm weather seems to have arrived I am having fun with “the hair”.  The problem is that my head gets very hot wearing it; especially as I have to wear either a scarf or hat on top of it as it looks rather wild without it.  Bill and I have been going out for walks in the morning so I tend just to wear a baseball cap as it much lighter.  I didn’t realise that the gap at the back of the hat showed that I had almost no hair.  To be honest it doesn’t worry me at all and hopefully nobody notices it so it doesn’t worry them either.

My hair is beginning to grow again slowly.  It doesn’t help that it is very fair; probably grey if I am honest.  My hair fell out slightly early and hopefully it will grow again early.  Not being a hairdresser I am not sure how long it will take to grow but the signs are good.

Although I don’t seem to have written much “no news is good news” as we used to say when I was growing up; life is slowly beginning to return to normal.  All I need now is to get the treatment out of the way and then wait for my “rebuild”.  This will probably be at the beginning of next year according to my doctor.  Whatever it takes I will work with it; I am just glad to feel good.

Friday 1st April 2011

Over a week with no treatment; no hospital visits and the sun is shining.  Yesterday I had the opportunity to visit a friend in Porto so I caught the train home, getting off at the further station from the house and walked back on the beach pathway.  It was so warm and so wonderful to see the sea, feel the warmth of the sun and just enjoy myself without feeling ill.  Life is great when it is normal.

This week I have been much stronger, we think that I had a something on top of the after effects as Bill was ill as well.  I had a flu type cold but with no immunity it knocked me out.  This week we are both doing so much better.  My chemo is Tuesday 5^th April so we praying and hoping that my blood count is ok to do the chemo.  Don’t get me wrong - I don’t enjoy the treatment; I just want it finished.

It is exactly 13 years today since Bill and I arrived in Portugal.  We spent six and a half years in Lisbon and the rest of the time here in Porto.  If I had a chance to be somewhere else with everything that has happened; the answer is no.  Although it is often difficult to be in a country where your knowledge of the language is poor and things don’t always work out like they should; I wouldn’t have changed anything.

Next Tuesday is going to be crazy; although my friend seems to think everything will work out.  The main problem is timing.  According to appointments I have a CAT scan which takes ½ hour at 11:30; my doctor’s appointment at 11:40; blood tests at 12:00 and my chemo at 13:30.  Now anyone who knows any public health system knows that appointments do not run on time.  It doesn’t help that Isabel is in France next week so is unable to help out.   Isabel has asked a colleague to help me and so I have to be at the hospital at 9:30 and she is going to take me to the analysis  department.  Hopefully she will help getting the blood works out of the way early.  Somehow we have to arrange everything else.  Fortunately Julie is coming with me to help with the language because by the time I have finished I will probably want to scream; or something worse.  We will have to wait and see how the Portuguese   public health system will work this one out.

I am writing this in two parts as I went out with friends this morning.  It was only a visit to MAKRO to buy apples for the CASA project; this is an organisation that works with the homeless and Alison who was with me is going out with them this evening; hence the apple run as we now call it.   It was nice to do normal things; even to the point of having a laugh that you can only have with really close friends.  We stood in front of the shampoo counter and discussed which shampoo I could use; although it may have to wait a while.  The other customers must have thought we were crazy; or they would have done if they spoke English.

I also realised that I have been out in the car two times this week and will be driving again tomorrow.  This is the most I have been in the car driving myself since November; it is nice to be free again.

The only annoying part at the moment is that I have no body heat at all.  Even though the weather is very nice with a blue sky and it is quite warm; 25+ degrees I only feel warm when I actually stand in the sun.  The other problem is that when I stand in the sun my head actually starts sweating when I have “the hair” on my head.  By the time I took it off my head was dripping wet.

Apart from that everything is looking good.